SO. Life's good. I like it here. Haven't eaten liver in a while, but I've eaten some real great rice and beans this week! Believe it or not, they're even BETTER the 197th time in a row. I'm kinda getting the feeling it's kinda like being an alcoholic actually, a really extreme alcoholic, because I'm kind of dependent on it now, and I think I might die if I stop eating them. But honestly, I'm not too worried about it, because it's great for gaining muscle mass! I think someone once said in the scriptures, "It is by small and simple beans that great muscles are come to pass." I'm not really sure who said that in the scriptures, but I think that it was Captain Moroni. And if ANYONE would know, it would be him. He's got biceps the size of watermelons in the Stripling Warriors picture, so I'm pretty sure he knows beans.
The pictures I attached on this email have some pretty sweet stories to go with them! The ceramic bull is pretty sweet, I got him free of charge (he's nude, by the way, so I'm actually gonna make a diaper for him). Elder Pinto and I went on splits this last week, and literally the first house we stopped in, the residing family practically pulled us in and struck up a warm conversation. The momma makes ceramics for a living, and after chatting with her for a while, and she, finding that she liked Elder Pinto and I quite a lot, gave me the bull, and tried to give Elder Pinto a 40-lb water buffalo too (CERAMIC bull, mind you, the live 40-lb water buffalo here aren't actually domesticated yet). And it was after that, that the family obliged to hear our message warmly. After Elder Pinto and I (after much Portuguese-butchering, of course) taught, they all obliged to pray about the message, after saying they already knew and felt it was true, and wanted to be baptized. IT WAS SOOO COOL! It was SOO cool, because I could literally tell the Lord had been preparing them to hear the message for some time now. They had all sorts of doubts about the Catholic church's ways, and they were in complete agreement with everything we taught. I'll admit, I almost peed my pants a little (not really, but I imagined doing it in my mind). AMAZING. Now I keep the ceramic bull around to remind me of the family, and also to ward off evil and danger, for example, salmonella and bats. And also baldness. I hate imagining myself bald. It's actually got me pretty worried lately, so the bull (named James Boanerges) stays on my desk to keep me relaxed and hairy.
Also this last week, I got to go on another splits, to a town called Itaporanga. One of the photos I sent is of a view from a proselyting area that's absolutely BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL. I seriosuly was having issues with not becoming a nature hobo, going straight up Tom Sawyer on that wilderness. I couldn't stop thinking about how PERFECT it would be for a little lakeside cottage with a little hammock strewn out in between some palm trees, just relaxing in retirement with my wife and canoe...Alright. Honestly so cool.
THAT splits was good, but almost ENTIRELY unproductive. We had FHE with a member family there, which we had to take a hike to get to up a huge hill. After that, we spent some time with another part-member family. While the others were chatting away delightfully with the family, some Brasileras (probably like, 16, 15 years old) pulled up on their bikes and joined the chat. It was all good, 'til I realized exactly WHY they were there...yeah. The Brazilian missionaries call them, 'uhsnakes' (pronounced, UH-snakes), American missionaries call them 'snakes,' and I call it, 'a despicable little teenage Brazilian girl who has no idea how far off I can see her coming when she says, "If you were serving in this city right now, I would get baptized, but just you, not the other missionaries."' So when I heard her say this, very suddenly I really wanted her to be very far away from me. I actually considered projectile vomiting in her direction, but realized that I would probably be the only one around that would appreciate the results (not really...okay maybe I thought about it a little...), and also that I would be really hungry if I suddenly emptied my stomach. And these days, my stomach's my number one, so I decided agasinst it. Meh, you can't win 'em all. Honestly, the girl was harmless (to me, at least, some missionaries are just too small to fight women off), and I actually felt bad for her, because what she said ended up making her look very silly. Yes, verily I say unto you, very silly indeed.
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MOOOOOOOM! I JUST REMEMBERED! CAN YOU PLEAAAASE PLEEEAASUH PLEEEEEASUH SEND ME THE RECIPIE FOR YOUR COOKIES??? PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE?? I would really like to see if I can whip them up as good as they turn out State-side!! AND YOU WANNA KNOW THE SINGLE LARGEST WEAKNESSSSSS OF BRAZIL??? (I'm mad now, that's why it's in caps) THEY. DON'T MAKE. COOKIES. HERE. BLASPHEMY BLASPHEMY BLASPHEMY! So also, just a hint here, if you wanted to be incredibly rich, just take your homemade cookie recipe here to Brazil and make a franchise. Easy as cake. Seriously, I have no idea what's wrong with them. So PLEASE make sure you send me a recipe next week!
Also, can one of you (Brianna or Momma would be the best) let Violette know I got her package? She, Gina, and some other mystery person who forgot to write their name on their letter to me all sent me an AWESOME package, and it arrived about a week ago. THANKYOU! Sending a response very soon!
Also, today or tomorrow, sending Caitlin's iPod stateside. Wrapped in in a clean sunday sock, stuffed in gently into a solid little box filled with paper stuffing, and it'll be on it's way soon. No idea when it should get there. Could actually be a month or so.
And Christmas...? Hm. Not sure! Definitely maybe a tie, OOH and some Crayola Twistables (I'm afraid of running out, I use them to draw sometimes and mark scriptures a lot), and some skittles and starburstsss! YEAH! PLEASE! And if you can (totally optional), stuff a small bag of froot loops or chocolate pebbles in there! Cereal is seriously pretty disappointingly bland here, not sure why, ya know. I would LOVE you EVEN MORE if you did that! Yeah, kinda like SOOMUCH MORE!
Okay bye now.
Elder Daniel Christopher Smileypantshasnoideawhatyouresayingyetifyourespeakingportuguesequickly Reneer
OH OH and the other picture I'm sending is of this cute little girl that's always walking around with the other kids where Elder Marques and I are working! She's the only blond around :) Looks like I'll actually haveto send it in another email. BYE!
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